Whispers from Beckey
Life In All It's Fullness
I am having a fibro flare up at the moment. My usual levels of pain and fatigue have increased a great deal, and symptoms that have been settled for a while are all playing me up again. I know exactly why though. It has been Easter weekend and we have been really busy. The weather has been lovely and we went out on Good Friday and Easter Sunday with family. I did use my wheelchair, of course, but I walked further than I normally would, and pushed myself harder. Why? Partly because I stubbornly wanted to prove to myself that I could do it, and partly because I wanted to get some exercise. It was also partly because I wanted to enjoy the time while feeling as normal as possible, and I really hate being in the wheelchair.
Then, on Monday, Lydia wanted me to make frog cake pops with her. There is a reason I gave up cake decorating. We spent hours making and decorating them between rest breaks, but I was totally wiped out ad in agony by the time we were finished, and Lydia was surprised at how long they took. But, they were SO cute! (and tasted delicious!).
Yesterday Lydia had some friends round for a get together in the garden (as we are still under certain lockdown restrictions). I was on the go most of the day with preparing food for them and sorting things out for them, and then spending time with Daniel. There was no opportunity to rest properly yesterday.
So today, I am in bed, and am trying to re-group and rest. There is so much to do, but I have already pushed my body far beyond it’s limit and I have no other choice but to stop. So, was it all worth it? 100% totally, yes! I would do it all again if I could. We have made some lovely memories this weekend. We had such a great time, and I have taken some lovely photographs. For me, those things far outweigh any pain and fatigue I have to put up with afterwards. Life is for living, and I have always been someone who has lived it to the full, and I have no intentions of letting my health restrictions stop me from doing that now. Will I learn any kind of lesson from this? Not about pacing myself, that’s for sure; but probably that sometimes it is worth pushing myself beyond my limits, o that I can experience the joys of life. There is always time for re-grouping afterwards.
When I was born, I had a hole in my heart. I had to have heart surgery when I was 3. The little boy in the bed next to me, who had his operation before me, didn’t survive; yet I did. When I was 11 I was diagnosed with scoliosis and had to have major surgery to insert a metal rod in my back to straighten my back. We were told that if I didn’t have the operation that I wouldn’t be able to walk and would be confined to a wheelchair by the time I was in my 30’s. So, as I see it, I have been given not just a second chance at life, but also a third! How very, very blessed I am! Life is short, and it’s a gift. I am determined to make the most of what I have been given.
One of my favourite Bible verses is John 10:10, where Jesus says “I have come that they might have life in all it’s fullness”. He certainly does give life, and it is full of blessing.
How do you enjoy making the most of your life?
Until next time,
Take care and God Bless,
Love, Beckey x
Our Walk At Coughton Court on Good Friday